Breaking Boundaries
by Faikitty
Summary: "Just how hard is it for you to open up to someone?" Kurogane/Fai.


And here's 16. Questioning for you all. This stupid thing gave me so much trouble. It wouldn't stay with my original ideas. It went from Pandora Hearts to Tales of the Abyss to Spice & Wolf, and this morning it decided it wanted to be Tsubasa. So yeah.

My first KuroFai hurt/comfort. Not sure why I've never written one before, but whatever. Takes place right after the Celes arc, at the start of the Shunraiki OVA.

Hope you like. *heart*

Disclaimer: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles (c) CLAMP

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><p><em>"For all my life... I've wanted strength. I didn't want those things precious to me to be taken away from me anymore. But... to have strength means to invite disaster to come your way, and strength alone, can't really protect you."<em>

_"...It seems that you do understand true strength after all."_

-X-

Fai relished the way the words tasted on his lips. "Kuro-sama..." he repeated once Tomoyo left. "It's been quite awhile since I've been able to call you that."

"That was your own doing," Kurogane scoffed. "It's not as though I somehow commanded you to stop giving me nicknames."

"Oh?" Fai raised an eyebrow. "As I recall, you commanded me to many times."

"And as_ I_ recall, you never once listened to me." Kurogane scooted over as Fai knelt, giving him room to sit on the covers with him. "So why did you do it?"

"Oh, you know… stuff happened, so…" Fai's eye narrowed as he looked at Kurogane, his gaze drawn to the ninja's left arm, or rather, what was left of it. "I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"Sorry for what?" Kurogane followed his gaze and frowned. "That wasn't your fault. It was my own choice. My arm was a small price to pay to save you."

Fai remained silent. He reached up and grabbed the collar of Kurogane's robe, gently pulling it off over his shoulder so he could get a better look. Even with the layer of bandages covering it, blood was slowly seeping through, dying them red. "I'm sorry," he repeated, his fingers lightly brushing over the wound.

Kurogane jerked his robe back on. "Stop it. Don't apologize about something that wasn't your fault."

"But..."

"Don't call me 'Kuro-sama' and then go back to being formal with me," Kurogane complained. "I thought you would be annoying again like you used to be."

Fai shook his head, his hair falling over his eye. "I'm never annoying, idiot," he said with an unrealistic smile. He leaned his forehead against Kurogane's chest. "I never was..."

Kurogane stared concernedly at him and set his hand on Fai's head, patting it awkwardly. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Fai looked up at him in surprise. "I should be asking _you_ that," he said. "You're the one who was hurt, not me."

"That's not true, now is it?" Kurogane questioned. "Yeah, I'm hurt in ways you can see, but my wounds will heal easily. What about you?"

Fai closed his eyes and set his head against Kurogane's chest again, this time placing his ear against it so he could hear his heartbeat. "Do I look injured? I'm fine," he lied.

Kurogane growled in frustration. "Just how hard is it for you to open up to someone?" he asked.

Fai chuckled. "I'm not refusing to open up to you," he told him, "but if I did, I doubt you'd like what you'd see."

Kurogane took Fai's chin and raised the mage's head so it was level with his own. "Try me," he challenged, his eyes searching Fai's as though he could read Fai's soul that way. Fai returned the stare for a moment but then looked quickly away.

"I don't want to."

"Why not?"

"Because..." Fai suddenly stood and started pacing the room. "I'm too scared to get close to people because I'm too scared of getting hurt again, but more so, I'm terrified that I'll hurt others. I've done it before. I've been the cause of misfortune to so many of my loved ones. All I can do is bring misery to people. I can't keep from getting close to people, most of all you! It's so aggravating, not being able to control how I feel!" Fai was aware of his rising voice, but he couldn't keep his volume down. "I realized that after I became a vampire, and I tried to create space between us again, but it didn't work at all! You just kept getting closer to me, finding ways around all of my wards!" He grew quiet again but continued his pacing. "Now I don't know what to do..."

Kurogane reached up and took hold of his wrist, pulling him back down onto the floor so he could see the blonde's blue eye. "You should give up," he suggested. "You can't try to keep people out of your life. It's impossible to go through life without anyone caring about you. It could be a parent, a sibling, a friend, an acquaintance, a random person on the street. For you, it's all of the people you went on this journey with. The kid, the princess, even the manjuu. They all care about you. And I care about you, more than you know. If you would just open your ears and listen to me when I say things, if you could just read between the damn lines, then you would know it." Fai's eye stayed glued to Kurogane's face, every nerve in his body tense with the shock of what the ninja was saying. "Just like we all care about you, you care about us, even if you don't want to admit it."

Fai crumpled into Kurogane's lap. He reached his arms around the black-haired man in a hug, clinging to him as if he would die if he didn't, his head buried in the crook of Kurogane's neck. Kurogane went rigid, fighting back a hiss of pain as Fai jarred his still-fresh injuries. "Why?" Fai wondered, his voice barely audible, even in the still of the night air. "Why do you, someone I tried so hard to stay hidden from, know me better than I know myself? It's hardly fair, if you ask me."

Kurogane snorted. "Life's not fair. By now you shouldn't expect it to be."

"I know... but still, it's not fair..." he whispered. "I wanted to stay away from you. Why did I have to be drawn to you so much? I'm still not sure if I should stay like this, when every instinct in my body is telling me to flee."

"What are you, a cat the big bad dog's going to eat?" Kurogane asked. "Ignore your instincts. There's a reason why humans rose above them. Besides, I'm sure if you dig deep enough, you're just deciphering them wrong. They're telling you to remain here, right here, just like this."

Fai's nails dug into Kurogane's back as he tried to resist closing in on himself. "Kurogane... why did you save me?" he questioned quietly. "Someone like me, who got on your nerves throughout the whole first half of our journey then tried to avoid you during the second half. Why would you ever save me?"

"Because," Kurogane sighed, "I _love_ you. Isn't that obvious?" Kurogane flinched as Fai's nails dug deeper, knowing the mage didn't mean to hurt him.

"...say it again."

"I love you."

Every muscle in Fai's body seemed to relax, and he released Kurogane. "I've never had anyone tell me that before except my brother," he murmured with a slight blush.

"Well you haven't been hanging around the right kind of people then," Kurogane told him. Carefully he cupped Fai's face in his hand and drew him near. He brushed a light kiss on the blonde's lips, touching him as though he were a porcelain doll that could break at any moment. Right now, Fai felt like he could. He kissed Kurogane back, the taste of the real "Kuro-sama" ten times better than the feel of the word.

"I...I love you too..." he said, pulling away. "You don't know how hard those words are for me to say."

Kurogane grinned. "I think I do. You think it was easy for me? I admitted my feelings to myself before you did, so I was constantly wondering why I was cursed to have fallen in love with someone who I thought hated me."

Fai blinked. "Why would you think I hated you?" he wondered. Kurogane just stared at him, straight-faced. "Oh. Right. Well, I don't. I promise."

"It's okay," Kurogane said. "I don't think that anymore."

Fai allowed himself a small smile, a real one, warm, and simple. No longer would he hide his feelings, not from himself, or anyone else. He would learn to be honest and open, with the one he loved as his teacher.

-X-

"_I won't hand over anything that amounts to giving my life away. Not anymore."_

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><p>Hope you liked it. Reviews and favs are appreciated, as always. I'll be giving you 17. Blood tomorrow, so keep an eye out for it. ;)<p>

One more thing before I sign off. Not to be punny or anything, but I have a question for YOU. I've been getting quite a few people lately saying they want sequels to a few of my KuroFai fics. Despite the fact that they're supposed to be one-shots, I would consider continuing them as future themes. Is it true that you guys want sequels? I'm not trying to sound like one of those "GIVE ME 500000 REVIEWS OR NO SEQUEL FOR YOU" people, it's just that I didn't originally intend to continue them and have no intention of doing so unless people really want them_._ So yeah. Thanks, everyone. :)_  
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